Recently I just finished reading, “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” by Dale Carnegie. I learned many useful social skills through this book, and am trying to implement them in my life. Some short-term goals I have are to remember other’s names and to always smile. Other goals which might take longer to learn would be to start asking meaningful questions to others during conversations, and also to show respect to other’s opinions.
Remembering some one’s name and smiling can really help your interactions with others. Smiling lets you spread happiness to others, something everyone wants to feel. Remembering other’s names is good because it has been proven that someone’s name is to them the most important sound in any language. Therefore, using the other person’s name in conversations tends to make them more interested in what you are saying.
I would also love to learn to start asking meaningful questions to others during conversations. Not just a monotonous, “How are you?” or “How was your day?” But to start asking questions that can really let you know them better, questions like, “Have you done anything interesting this past week?” or, “What would you like to make time for?” Another thing I would like to do is to let others express their opinions about different things, and also to show respect to their opinions. I find that doing so is hard for me because I always manage to find something wrong with it. That is why I should slow down and let others properly explain everything.
I think that implementing these things in my life will improve my social skills and help me not hate the people I dislike as much. Smiling and remembering other’s names can help you have more pleasant interactions with others.
I would be convinced to use Spreeder every day if I knew how important it is to be able to read quickly. Because I now know how important speed reading is, I use Spreeder every day. Speed reading abilities are very important because they allow you to learn so much more from books and articles in a shorter time period.
Spreeder is a free online app for speed reading. By learning how to speed read, the time to read long, boring assignments can be cut in half. Instead of reading at 400 words per minute, you could learn to read at 800, or even 1000. That way, you will have much more time to do other things.
Speed reading is very important, and I would recommend it to anyone. Spreeder is a great program, and it’s free! Just copy and paste whatever you want on spreeder and adjust the speed of which you want to read it at.
*I am not paid to endorse Spreeder
This is my essay on how to Win Friends and Influence People, a book by Dale Carnegie. All you need to do to get people to do what you want them to do is to make them want to do it, and do make them want to do it, you have to let them find out wants in it for them. Let’s just say that you decide to go fishing, and it happens that you really like chocolate, but the fish, for some odd reason only like worms. You don’t bait your rod with chocolate, but with worms. You don’t think about what you want, but what the fish wants. You bait the hook to suit the fish. You put yourself in another’s shoes. To get people to listen to you, you have to find out what they want, to construct it according to their needs. Others just don’t care what you want, they only care about themselves.
Therefore, to make friends, you have to really care about others. Instead of asking your friend, “Hey, how was your day so far?” But just not caring, try to actually care about what they have to say. Become genuinely interested in their lives. They will love to talk about themselves. Everyone has an interesting life. But you might have never known if you have never asked. Who knows what you could find out. Some things like remembering someone’s name can really be helpful. It has been proven that someone’s name is to them the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Focus on using their name more, not just remembering it. You have to talk in terms of their interests and make them feel as if they are important.
The second point I will talk about is on how to win people to your way of thinking. First of all, you have to show respect to others opinions, not just shouting out, “No!” This can be really helpful if you are working with a group on a project. You have to begin in a friendly way and appeal to their way of thinking. Another good thing to do is to get the other person to do the talking, letting them feel as if it is their idea. Try to see things from their view. Be sympathetic to their ideas, and appeal to their nobler motives. At the end, tell them your ideas, and throw down a challenge.
Last of all, as a leader, you have to change people around you without getting them mad at you. Begin with praise and honest appreciation for what they have done, but call attention to their mistakes indirectly. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing them. Ask them questions instead of giving them direct orders, and let the other person save face if they make a mistake. Make sure to praise every single improvement, as small as it may be. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to, and use honest encouragement. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
In conclusion, It is important to show respect to other people and appeal to their wants. “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” by Dale Carnegie is a great book, and I recommend it to everyone who would like to learn to have great social skills.
For those who don’t know, an Elitist program is a program which is run by someone who has much more authority than the others. I think, that Washington did not run this program as an Elitist one. Washington believed in, get this, equal rights. The fact that his program was not Elitist was demonstrated in his autobiography, in where he talked about the fact that he did not like it that he had to represent all blacks. He did not like that seat of power. In his speeches, he also talked about how he was just looking for blacks to be treated as equals with whites.
In conclusion, I think that Washington did not set the program for gaining social acceptance for blacks as an Elitist program. Washington believed in equal rights.